heartbreaks.

hello, i wouldn't said that today is my worse day. it is the best day ever. me and amy were bestfriend again. thanks to my textbooks today :) but unfortunately, after i send all those textbooks to Mdm Jane, I online my twitter, facebook and tumblr for sure blog. i'm suprise that my friend Eah, tweeted that i never thought my bestfriend would done this to me. something like that la. so, i asked her that afternoon. why she tweeted like that? and why she would DM amy? but she told me, it was all about Bonai. then, i thought nothing happen. than she said she's wants to have a bath. i said yes. then both of us offline.

two hours later, she's online Aesha's facebook. And she tweeted that whatever it is they still my bestfriend or something. And I guess she knows that me and Aesha doesn't like her boyfriend. me and aesha recently chat at facebook about her boyfriend azmi and her. we don't like the way azmi treat her. maybe she love it but i don't. and I don't know what she thought about me and aesha. because she's like dissapointed toward us. :'( so, i decided to said sorry. but i read something at her and aesha chat. and it really makes me sad. i don't want to said it here. i don't want to cause a fuss.

thus, i cried all evening about this. i decided to deactivated my twitter. and tumblr? i poured all my feelings there. :'( why? i thought we're bestfriends. you ignored me because of azmi, i keep my mouth shut. but you? when i done this. why can't you do that? are you blind now because you have azmi? are you? i hate to said this, but. i wish you and azmi happily ever after and i won't be there for you because now i know who did you choose. it breaks my heart but whatever it is. you still be my bestfriend in my own world. you cares about me when there's no one. i can still be the place you cried where you fight with azmi. i would because I love you. i won't hurt the people i love. i will try to make them happy. i guess that's it. hmm

until the next post.

sincerely pais

anje lol

hey everyone i'm edited this post because it was so simple. i know this girl is because you're naughty naughty i'm mr simple. but, if you ate her, you would be dissapointed right? whatever how it spelled. luls

now, this is my ANJE <3 muahh  muahhh. she's the twin of me and Aesha. she's sometimes 'warak' sometimes 'karak'. k i know you don't understand that but who cares? it was a languages of me and my fairies :* 

Name : Hazirah binti Abdul Hadi

Age : 17 years old

School : smk st mary

Status : taken by Azmio Renyuk Goncang Makan (not a real name)

Craving for : driving a car

Nickname: Eah Abdzzzz nah, kiddin. you can call her eah

lulz. actually i'm tired too today but it's for my ANJE <3 . want to know her? get to know her. hahaha nah, kidding candy. :* she's a colourful person you know? she can be wild she can be kind. she was full of drama! p/s : she learned it from me. but my typo-ness i influeted by her. she the typo-tonic person. she love freedom. and her anniversary between her and that Azmio guy is 11. not elevenmarch okay. do not told her that. she might become shehulk lol her favourite place is Swee Kang thats why she wants to take over Swee Kang lulsss kidding again! hehe 

until the next post

sincerely pais

this is yeah sayangg ;)

hehe fyi, she's not wearing hijab. both of us tuition at masjid jamek. that's where we ( peejoy, me and her) met. hehe sweet love story lol. btw this handphone that uun took is belongs to Amy. well, she is beautiful what? hahaha. 

Name : Nurul Nazifah Martin

Age : 17 years old. 

School : OPENG 

status : taken. 

craving for : idk. heh :p

she's a straight forward person. she tell it just what it is. hehh. she's also fun to be with. she's exactly like peejoy. that's why she's peejoy girlfriend when at masjid jamek. lulzzzz

okay done with sayang now let's go to ANJE. lulz

until the next post

sincerely pais

meet my babyyy :*

hehe i know i'm repeating introducing them. but this one is more scientific. hehe. this baby is my baby. well, you know baby is what kind of baby. k =.='

Name : Nuraesha Binti Suhaimi

Age: 17 years old

School : SMK ST MARY

status : taken :)

craving for : ipedtoo k apa tek. luls

oh ya nickname : aesha 

she's a fun person to be with. she doesn't care about people said around her. she live in her own life. won't disturb others unless she had to. she is more like my twin. why? she knows what i want and she knows what i'm thinking and sometimes knows what am i up to. hehe weird kan? but it's fine. we know each other since 2004. long time eh? eight years we both known each other. if i told you guys we've never fight. i'm lying lol 

until the next post. baby, i miss youuuu. 

sincerely pais. 

meet my darling :*

i only can get this picture because she private her pictures in facebook. so, it's hard to choose which one is more better. hehe so, now. as you can see. this is my Peejoy <3

Name : Rafizah Binti Hasbie

Age : 17 years old

School : STAR ( sekolah tunku abdul rahman) 

Birthday : 12th August 1994

Status : Single

Craving for : KIKO <3 

she is a good friend. she stayed with you through thick and thin. she love to make other people laugh. she's being herself. she won't be mad for smallest thing. she's open minded too. she's the friend that love to gossiping other people just for fun. she can get crazy if she gets bored hahahaha k enough said <3

that's all for my sweet darling :* miss you soo much. 

until the next post. 

sincerely pais

i need another story

as you can see my very-dramatic-title hehe. i want someone by my side. that love with me for the way i are. and will not leave me and will stick with through thick and thin. hahaha. sounds so wrong right? hmm, i was so alone by this month passes. i'm already graduated. so, i'm as free as a free bitch looking for their next love. lol. how can i be sure that he can love me for the way i am? it's easy! he will introduce you with their friends without any hesitate. lol not explained anything. hehe. i'm just a girl with a sweet smile and sweet face. but i'm chubby as you can see. or not. =.=' hahaha. actually, i don't need any boyfriend. i'm just being me :) haahahaha so, i'm mumbling again. hahahaha 

okay until the next post.

sincerely pais :* 

i'm scared

i don't know what to do. so, i have the gut to tell BM about SS. now, let's just hope. he will wanted this. i love you BM. i sure do. you're really like my brother. what will i do if there is no you in my life? i was the one who's got lose in the darkness of life. and you were like the torch that keeps me in the safe place far away from the evil.

i love my fairies too. Aesha and Eah and Uun and Peejoy. :') they never left by my side when i need them like the night before. i was so amazed by them. they are really really my BESTFRIEND! it would be nice if Megan there all along too. but, i just can't forget what she has done. they can me laughed they never let me cry. that's why i' so scared if they sad. :') i love fourth of you yes I do.

i know i should love my family. but, they doesn't know me like BM, Aesha, Eah, Uun and Peejoy. they will always tried to make me feel better. :') how can i live without those five? BM may at KL. but, i don't mind. i still love him. funny to said. yeah, i kinda love him. i want to stay with you guys forever and never ever met someone else. i'm scared i will forget you guys and the new-people are much too different from you guys. i don't mind if you guys doesn't feel the same way. the way you guys cared about me is enough. i would never asked for more.

you guys are the most people I love in my heart. yes, top 5, i guess. again. i wanna live with you guys forever. :*

I LOVE YOU GUYS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

until the next post. i'm so seriously crying wrote this whole thing down. :')

sincerely pais

i'm bored kbye

Allah's fate.

hey, i wanted to tell you guys about love story of my life. i've never feel the meaning of love. i keep on searching and searching. but there's no one I can feel the love. the person i can be with. but when I'm 12 years old. i met NS. he taught me to love but only for short time. not long after that, when i'm 15 years old. i lose my grandmother. Taruyah Binti Gapor. and that is the time I first time feel how is it like when we losing a person that we really love. that 2009, i'm so lost. i don't have anyone by my side that i can trust. until. i met SHL. she tells me, she likes me. :'( so, she asked me will I accept to be her girlfriend? yes, she is a tomboy. but the relation only lasts for six days. i asked SB to helped me. but it was turn out me and her become lovers. -.-' i don't even know what to do. so, i just be with SB. then, day after day. i'm started to like SB. and I love her with all my life. but we had to break because we're PMR that time. so, that is the last time I becoming lesbian. then, i met HA. he was the first man who opened my heart to love again in september 2010. i was in love with him that time. because he's can protected me from anything and he love with for the way I am. he can makes me laughed. and he can taught me about religion. he was a good man. but i was fool and blind because after that i'm in love with RF. JUST for that time because i doesn't ready for any relationship yet because HA and me doesn't talked to each other due to him confessing his love for me. but i declined because I'm in love with RF. RF and me doesn't contact anymore because i don't trust him. then in april 2011. i found HO. he may younger than me but i love him for the way he are. then. we break in july. and that's it. i guess you all know about the 'Sad Story' that i posted yesterday right? and that's the story of me and HO. and now. i'm alone. i don't know where to find someone like HA and HO. yeah that's it.

until the next post.

sincerely pais

i don't know what is wrong with me!

yo! i just wanna tell you guys that i don't know what is wrong with me. i keep on talking about BM here. sheesh. and now, my mom knew about this whole blog. she told my dad that i have a boyfriend. mom, dad. I doesn't have those thing. i completely single and available. and oh yeah. i watched Transformer 3. Ya Allah, i cried when Ironhide is dead. :'( i know. nothing to do with my title up there gehehehe. i don't know what will my life at. i think i'm going to die or something. luls. so, here the picture of me now. :3

okay readers. until the next post. muahhh! :*

sincerely pais

sooo

he online while i'm here. sorry BM <3 i was too busy here. luls. and i really felt that i shouldn't be mad at him because who knows he was busy right? hehe :3 oh well, he works today. so i'll just wait then. hoho not again. this time i just hope or no hope. it doesn't make any sense did it, right? hehe

until the next post!

sincerely pais

i can't sleep

hey. again hey. -.-' ummm. i can't sleep. maybe because of BM maybe :S and i changed my mood. it was so sad. haha i wait for BM but he doesn't online. so, this song I attribute to him. i hate waiting. well, actually not exactly. because I was very patience person. luls. don't know what to mumbling anymore. i keep on talking about BM here because I'm waiting for him! did I mentioned it before? hmmm :( it's 1.28 am now. and 12 December 2011. :/ 100210 was hurt by 101210 k what was that? D: hahaha forget about him. i'm so frustrated. -.-' I wanted him to meet this girl SST.

i would do anything to him. including this. because I love him. i will tried to make he's happy as long as i could. maybe he doesn't understand why i act like this. but whatever okay. i have a secret that you didn't know. :/ if he doesn't love me i don't care. at least he would be my BFF and BROTHER :') 

iloveyou,BM <3

k until the next post, sincerely pais

tried to be positive :(

hey guys. i just wanna tell you. i have wait my bro since this afternoon :'( i don't know what's wrong with him but i tried to think positive. i've done something for his own good. why he can't online today? :'( right now i decided to don't online facebook for a few days. heh senang cerita kecik ati bah! yahhh :'( but it's okay. maybe he's busy right? who knows. busy with the girl that his friend tried to made them couple bla bla. k bye

sincerely pais

this is for that 'someone'

Mr. Know It All
Mr know it allWell ya think you know it allBut ya don't know a thing at allAin't it something y'allWhen somebody tells you something bout youThink that they know you more than you doSo you take it down another pill to swallow
Mr. Bring Me DownWell ya like to bring me down, don't yaBut I ain't laying downBaby I ain't going downCan't nobody tell m how it's gonna beNobody's gonna make a fool out of meBaby you should know that I lead not follow
(Chorus)Oh you think that you know methat's why I'm leaving you lonelyCause baby you don't know a thing about meYou don't know a thing about me
You ain't got the right to tell meWhen and where to go, no right to tell meActing like you own me lately[ From: http://www.metrolyrics.com/mr-know-it-all-lyrics-kelly-clarkson.html ]Yeah baby you don't know a thing about meYou don't know a thing about me
Mr. Play Your GamesOnly got yourself to blameWhen you want me back againBut I ain't fallin back again
Cause I'm livin' my truth without your liesLet's be clear baby, this is goodbyeI ain't comin' back tomorrow
(Chorus)
So what, you've got the world at your feetAnd you know everything about everythingBut you don'tYou still think I'm comin' back but baby you'll see
(Chorus)
Mr. Know It AllWell ya think you know it allBut ya don't know a thing at allYeah baby you don't know a thing about meYou don't know a thing about me

just a story

hey, i took this story from one tumblr :3 

hello guys. it’s 3 am and I’m still awake. :)

i wanted to tell you guys one sad story. 

there was this girl. she never gone out dating or what-so-ever. then, one day. she met this guy. about in April ago. they were happy then couple in June. the guy teach her all of the lover stuff. And out of the blue, the guy wants a break up. she doesn’t know what to do. because she never felt like that way and she just saying yes to his favor. because he’s happiness is hers and that’s enough. she doesn’t know who to talked about this. she loses her brother just because wanted to be with the guy. her friends? she doesn’t want them to feel sad too. so she keep it to herself and put it in her blogspot. all she want is to expresses her own feeling. and day after day. month after month. 

one day the guy came back. he was so piss off about the blog that she wrote about him. how did he know about the blog? she would asked it if she have the gut. he asked her to delete it. and funny to said, he wasn’t nicely asked her to do that. doesn’t he knew that all of this made her cried all night?

I guess not. 

the end. the sad part is. the girl is still can’t get over him. and keep crying about it until doesn’t sleep and still online around 3 am.

until the next post 

sincerely pais

meet qaqah

freedom \m/

6th December 2011 : 

me, eah and aesha is currently finished our SPM! (lol) so we are free bitch! hahahaha! 

there were lot of pictures we took but aesha and eah only upload these 

HAPPY MOMENTS <3 hahaha 

later that night we hang out at the spring. but we forgotten to took pictures but that's fine there were always next time HAHAHA 

p/s: i'm the ugly one at here right? :/ hehe

so until the next time. i was so hungry right now.

sincerely pais 

finally ( THE CASE CLOSE)

hey guys, i know you wanted to know my blog is all about. okay let it just be.. a confession maybe? lol. what am i saying? so here it goes my first confession :D

before this, we were not just five. we were six. actually i have one more bestfriend. that was before and now are not. because.. she lied to us, you know.
she told us she has a boyfriend. but she don't. she even lied to us about she confess to one boy that she been in love since 14 or 15 years old like that. i thought it was true. but until time to time, i started to feel like something fishy.
so.. i brave myself to took the boy's number from her phone when we were in tuition. later the week after, i text them. i asked them, do she really really told them that she love them? and what do you know. they said : I swear, NO~ i was so frustrated when knew about this. and i don't want to build any grudge over her so i took time to calm myself. due to my SPM is all around the corner that time.
i was suprise she wrote a letter telling us that we were not fair enough. we abandoned her! she even said if she was not there with us, it's okay right. and by that time i was so mad. so i decided to not to talked to her. BECAUSE SHE GAVE US THE LETTER ON THE FIRST DAY OF SPM! what was she thinking? i hate her because she doesn't think about me. what if i don't concentrate with the SPM? did she thought of that? i know she was not. so, let her be without me and my fairies. i am so over with her.

okay enough said. until the next post.

sincerely pais

what my mom told me -.-'

so, i asked my mom whether can or not i put her picture and all of family members here. and you know what the answer?

NO!

oh my God mom. thanks a lot. -.-'

sorry. until my next time. hahaha

sincerely pais

said Happy Birthday to my love! :*

let me introduce you with my man :*

the belated boy! BIO MATRAH luls. he was 'manis' isn't he? hahaha

and this white shirt boy down here is THE BIRTHDAY BOY! Mohammad Adib Abdul Rahman. happy birthday wish for the third time darling. hehe please don't be so cute. hahaha btw, they are brothers. hehe.

anyway, i told you guys this because I love both of them.

but not as much as I love BM la. hehe do you guys get it?

i love him because :

• he listened to me when i am sad. 
• he would never let me down when i need him 
• even he was so busy he would never tell haha
• he's quite a charmer you know? lol 
• he was like my own brother or more like bestfriend
• i can be myself when with him but not in front of him. i'm shy. :p
• he was craziest boy alive! nah, kidding! he was number one in my heart. as in boys. luls

so that's it. until the next post. 

sincerely pais

meet my five best friend.

seventeen girls :* 

 the name is Hazirah Abd Hadi a.k.a Eah! *the one who's holding phone. i dont even know who's the emotional person besides her. -.-'

 The name given is Nuraesha Suhaimi a.k.a Aesha .

 AHA! the one and only Rafizah Hasbie a.k.a Peejoy

and this beauty is Nurul Naziefah Martin and known as Uun


AND AT LAST BUT NOT LEAST!! :

this awesome lady name was AMY AMILYA BINTI RANANI a.k.a AMY

I LOVE THEM!

until the next post.

sincerely pais

about me :)

hello!


before we get too down with my post. i wanted to introduced myself because I don't get the chances to do that last blog. hehe. so here it is!

READ THIS PLEASE :

• i'm wearing hijab since i was 10 years old.
• i was born in February and that's made me Aquarian!! 
• i am friendly, nice, kind, talkative and cute ( hehe)
• i am down to earth people. 
• i don't hurt people's feeling easily not if they hurt me first lol 
• i got one big sister ( Nur Amirah Ashikin) and one brother ( Mohd Amirul Firdaus) and one small sister ( Nur Afiqah Farzana)
• my dad's name are Razak @ Abdul Razak Bin Saleh and my mom's is Norzihan Binti Ilias. 

          ( okay i know they got nothing to do with this)

• i am 17 years old. and already graduated from SMK ST MARY's kuching, sarawak on 11/11/11. 
• i am so SIMPLE. i don't care what people talked about me. 
• i used to have a long hair but now it's short because of my head keep on dizzy. 
• i love CHOCOLATE! especially KITKAT, CADBURRY and NUTELLA. 
• Famous Amos is my favourite shop and Bookstore is the place i love to be. 
•  i love spicy food. especially 'The Group Of Sambal' hehe
• i got so many ex but there's only a few i keep on remembering. That is : HA, RF, HO, SB and NS 
• i have a talent singing but i'm too coward to showed it. 
• I GOT 5  bestfriend. 

( Nuraesha Suhaimi , Amy Amilya Ranani, Hazirah Abd Hadi, Rafizah Hasbie & Nurul Naziefah Martin)

that's all i guess? if you wanted to know more. just asked okay? when i told i'm friendly then i am friendly. i ate rice not human. HAHA 

until the next post dear readers. 

sincerely pais

meet me, Nur Azirah:)

HAI! :D

i wanted to smile but my sister disturbed me by clicking the button webcam immediately -.-' so this is my wanted-to-smile but I'm not picture. haha weird calling pictures lalalala. for you guys information, I took this picture on last Wednesday! my freedom picture hoho. k I'm back with the mumbling. k heh

until the next post dear readers


sincerely pais 

hello :)

hey! remember me? so, this is a new blog after Beloved Pais :) i had to removed it because of personal reasons. hope you guys respect it. but if you still want to know why. i don't mind to tell you guys. hehe. before that, please add my Facebook (Faezah Razak) and follow me in twitter! (@likeicareyo) and my tumblr too (Hardly Untitled) :) yeah, if you guys have a problem by finding it. just add my facebook k. i always on my facebook when I'm online. :D so, that's it I guess. I need to think of a story for you guys entertainment. i mumbling a lot didn't I? hehe my bad. sorry.

k until the next post dear readers!

sincerely pais